Heaven on Earth

On Saturday, Baba, Zippy, and myself headed out to my grandparent's farm. Baba was in heaven. Almost all of his favorite things are on the farm: cows (moos!), tractors (putt-putts), and cats ('ilis). All that we were missing was his other obsession, trains.

Baba and I spent almost the entire day outside. He tried to befriend some cats, but they kept running away from him.

It always makes me laugh that he is so surprised that the small, defenseless farm cats run away from him (okay, okay, I know that farm cats aren't defenseless - I have a couple scars on my arms to prove it). I tried to explain the difference between domesticated and ferrel cats, but he didn't seem to get it.

He did get to drive, with his great-grandpa's help, a bobcat, a four-wheeler, and a putt-putt.
He has driven 3 different brands of tractors, John Deere (Zippy's dad is a John Deere man), Oliver (his great-grandpa loves Olivers), and White (interesting tractor history side-note: at some point in history Oliver became White, so I guess, technically, Oliver and White are sort of the same brand, but still, 3 different brands of tractors before the age of 2? How many people can claim that?).
This trip to the farm he was not scared of the cows at all. He befriend a calf, who tried to suck the mittens off of Baba's hands (calves, like baby's have a strong need to suck and will suck anything that comes close to them, hands, milk replacer, mittens, what have you). He also enjoyed "sneaking" up on the cows in their pens and saying "boo!" He thought scaring the cows was hilarious.

And, thankfully, before the end of the day, he befriended a cat. This cat, who for some reason followed Baba everywhere, was probably insane. Encouraged by his kitty shadow, Baba walked around the farm telling the 'ili about the farm. He'd say, " 'ili moo!" and point to the cows. Or " 'ili putt-putt" and point to the tractor.

I didn't have the heart to tell him that this 'ili had grown up on the farm and had probably seen all the moos and putt-putts before. When he got too far ahead of his new friend, he would stop, turn around, and say " 'ili go!"

A picture is worth 50,000 words

I've really got nothing more to say, the picture says it all. I finished my first draft on my still nameless novel with 7 days to spare. Hooray!

Gobble, gobble!

My family is all about tradition. There is the tradition of laying under the Christmas tree and singing (yelling) Christmas carols as loud as we can. There is the tradition of my mother never putting our names on our Christmas presents, only a code (one year Ditty was all prime numbers and I was numbers that weren't prime, etc).

We also like to play "fun" games. Ditty started a "fun" game where you put a deck of cards into four piles, cout to three, and then everyone grabs a pile. Lots of fun. There is also Bing-offs. Which is really an abbreviated version of BINGO. You play until one spot on your card is covered.

But now we have a new fun game and tradition. Its called bend over and play catch between your legs until the boy laughs. Then when he doesn't think that is funny any more, you fall over. It's really quite enjoyable. Happy Thanksgiving!

Why Doesn't Wili Like Me?

Wili is Baba' s best friend. I mean, BESTEST BEST BEST BEST friend. The first thing when he wakes up in the morning and is freed from his cell he starts his quest for 'ili'. Much to a certain cat's delight the quest is not ended until she gets her good morning kiss and Baba gets his good morning mouthful of fur.

So why doesn't Wili return Baba' s love with the same gusto?

I don't know.

They both love climbing the cat tree and looking out the window. They both love curling up on a warm lap.


They both love the cat tent, although Wili tends to sit in the cat tent and Baba tends to wear the cat tent as a hat.

They both like decorating cookies and eating frosting (yes, my cat eats frosting. Never open a box of Nerds around my cat, a friend of mine learned that the hard way when Wili nearly took her hand off to get some of the Nerds she was eating).

And, sadly, it isn't just Wili who runs away when Baba toddles in her direction. It's most 'ili's (Baba's word for cat). It's really quite sad when you think about it. All Baba wants to do is kiss them. What could a small, defenseless cat have to fear in Baba?

Oh, happy day!

Once upon a time I bought a used text book on half.com. Well, the stupid poo-poo head selling it took my money and never shipped it (I can think of several names to call her, but I won't write them, I'll just call her multiple names in my head. There, I feel better). Long story short, I found out this morning that the good people at half.com are refunding my money and $90.80 will be credited to my credit card within 72 hours.

I am so rich we went to Target and spent half of my refund. Only 12,000 words until my novel is el fine and I can get back to blogging. Hooray!

Bam!

30,000 words. Bam! Just 20,000 more measly little words and then I can return to the things that are truly important: blogging and playing Diablo.

And editing my novel and submitting it for publishing, etc. etc. etc.

Side note: How come when I spell check through my blog, 'blogging' isn't a word? Hmm.

Fil

So today we went up to Zecker Zinnesota to pick the boy up from my parent's house (my mom's birthday was on Saturday and she wanted the boy overnight as a birthday present. That was a present I could afford!). We went to lunch at Zippy's parents house.

To say that Zippy's father is special would be an understatment. Today Fil (father-in-law, get it? get it?) compared the condition of college football players to slaves. I'll let that sink in.

First of all, WTF? Second of all, are you kidding? Although my understanding of history may be sketchy at best, I don't remember reading about the slaves getting full rides to top notch universities. If Zippy wouldn't have grabbed me with Fil opened mouth and inserted foot I probably would have leapt across the room and kicked him.

After getting dogged at Zippy's sister's wedding (I, who have been married to Zippy for 3 years and have been with Zippy for 7 years, did not have a seat at a family table) I didn't think anything could surprise me. I was wrong.

I don't know what to say besides WTF?

Time and Words

How come at work (not necessarily my new job, just work in general) a minute takes an hour and an hour takes a lifetime, yet when I get home, time goes so fast I don't have enough hours in the day to finish everything I need or want to do?

I hit the 20,000 word mark last night on my novel. 20 days let to write an additional 30,000 words. Sometimes this work is writing itself and sometimes I can't imagine finding another 30,000 words of story. It's quite daunting and exciting.

Laundry Woes

It seems that ever since I became a mother, I've been doing a ridiculous amount of laundry, so it would be reasonable to conclude that I would be fairly good at sorting the copious amounts of clean laundry, right?

Wrong.

Oh sure. I'm good at sorting some of the clean laundry. Underwear are fairly straight forward. My undies are cute, Zippy's are more masculine (ie more fabric), and Baba's underwear are of the disposable diaper variety and don't end up in wash.

Pants are pretty easy, too. The shortest pants belong to Baba. If the number on the size of the larger pants is below 32 the pants are mine. If the number is 32 or larger then they are Zippy's. No problems there.

Shirts aren't too much trouble either. Neat cartoon characters? Baba's! Button up and formal? Zippy's. Large T-shirt? Zippy's. Cute shirt or medium T-shirt? Mine. (Just ask me how much I paid for this shirt: Okay, I'll tell you. Less than $3! I got 3 shirts and 2 pairs of pants at Vanity for $21.75).

So what's the problem? Socks! Baba and my socks are almost identical. There have been several times when one of my socks will end up in his drawer. As Baba would say, "Uh-oh!"

(from left to right: Baba's sock, my sock, Zippy's sock)

Bring it on!

Because writing 50,000 words in a month isn't enough of a challenge I decided to make it harder by writing in a genre (chick lit) that I've never written in before. Why oh why couldn't I just stick to sci fi and/or fantasy?

By the way, I'm at 9215, still ahead of schedule (yeah!). Next year I am doing the blog everyday instead of the novel in a month thing. Oh well. Live and learn. Back to the novel.

Day 3

I've written 6,179 words. My goal for to day was to be at 5,001 words. Hooray! So far, so good.

100th Post Extravaganza

This started off with a little, tiny, baby thought, "Hey, I could blog." If I survived my first year of being a mother I can do anything. So I thought about it for a while, did my research, and discovered a glorious, time consuming community full of women like myself.

I took a deep breath and created a new blog. I inspired ZennieZou to do the same. It is so much easier to type for a few minutes and hit 'publish post' than write in my journal everyday. My journal, by the way, feels neglected and dust covered. My computer does not.

There are a million things to write about and I always want to publish one more thing, tell one more story, or post one more picture of a certain Baba.











I am very thankful to my loyal fan (Thank you ZennieZou!), and my frequent readers (Zippy, Ditty, and whoever else is lurking out there), and I'm confident within the next 100 or so posts my blog will take off like Baba avoiding getting dressed after his bath!














I probably just wasted 100 or so words that could have been used towards my novel. That's it. I'm copying and pasting all my blogs into a word doc and my novel is done! Just kidding, I am at 2,830 words and avoiding increasing my total very nicely, thank you.

Happy Halloween!!!

Happy Halloween! Baba was a puppy. Zippy and I were homicidal maniacs. Simple and classic; they look just like everyone else.

I guess, since tomorrow is the first day of November (let the novel writing begin) I'll see you in a month. Big sigh.

Things to decide before 12:01 am November 1st:
What genre?
What is the story about?
Characters?
Plot (optional, of course)?
Conflict?
Resolution?
Why do I torture myself by making me write a novel in a month?

Candy bars

I really want a candy bar. I mean I really want a nice, juicy, chocolaty candy bar.

I used to work in shipping with a friend of mine, Mandell. One day we were talking about "hit the spot" moments. She said on her wedding night, after her and her husband consummated their vows, she's going to say, "Mmm. That hit the spot."

A candy bar would definetly hit the spot. I have a feeling that the Hep B booster I am getting in an hour isn't going to hit the spot the way a candy bar would.

Expensive Entertainment

Here is proof positive that children are the most expensive form of entertainment.


Yes, you are seeing the camera shake and hearing Zippy and I try to control our laughter in the background.

Quick note: This video takes a long time to load. I'm working on that. Patience young grasshopper, it will load eventually. In my unbiased opinion, it is worth the wait.

Christmas and Pizza

I love Christmas. My Christmas tree goes up the day after Thanksgiving like clockwork. I am almost done Christmas shopping, yet even I question why the Christmas decorations go out in stores with the Halloween decorations.

Put your Halloween decorations and candy on clearance (Okay. Fine. Just candy. I'm not really going to buy any Halloween decorations anyway) and then you can bring out the Christmas stuff. Don't waste valuable floor space with Thanksgiving stuff. I really don't need to decorate for Thanksgiving nor am I going to buy anyone a Thanksgiving card and/or present.

But I will take a cheap turkey. Yum.

We stopped at Nick-N-Willy's pizza today. We normally don't eat out that often; the biggest reason being we are poor. But we stopped today because we were hungry, and we get an extra $2 for Baba's Upromise account (PS, we are the greatest parent's ever. We have $1.32 in college savings thus far. That should maybe buy a pencil when Baba gets to college). Bad idea. The pizza was by far the best pizza I have ever tasted. It was perfect! Lots and lots of toppings and very little cheese. And it was pretty reasonable, price wise. There lunch special (which we ordered two of) was an 8 inch personal pizza and a fountain drink for $4.95. And it wasn't just a cheese pizza, it was any pizza. Yummy and dangerous. But, I guess, since we are saving for Baba's college tuition by eating out we can afford it.

(I'll just forget that we and Baba would be better off if we deposited $10.54 (our total) into his college savings account and ate at home. But still, $2.84 in his college fund and pizza is better than $10.54 in his college fund and no pizza. Right? Right?)

My Day By the Numbers

1: Number of stuffed bugs living in my living room (a ladybug).
0: Number of drinks I had today.
3: Number of drinks I wish I would have had today.
1: Number of showers I took today.
2: Number of miles I ran today.
2: Number of times I weighed myself today (one time I was holding Baba so I was technically weighing him).
3: Number of animals whose meat I tried today (chicken, duck, pheasant).
1: Number of rocking horses that Baba received as a Halloween present (um, where's my Halloween present?)
32: Number of times Baba mounted the horse.
32: Number of times Baba dismounted the horse.
57: Number of times Baba pressed the horse's ear to make his tail wag.
1: Number of eyeballs injuried by the snack cupboard.
9: Number of hours of sleep I got last night.
10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000: Number of times Baba said, "Uh-oh!" today.
28: Number of times Baba went to look for Pudge but found him sleeping.
1: Number of naps Baba took today.
17: Number of times Baba asked for "more" today.
2: Number of times I said, while watching my parent's cable TV, "boy, am I glad I don't pay for cable."
78: Number of times Baba said "moo" and/or located a cow.
8: Number of minutes until bed, hopeful.
68: Number of minutes until bed, actual.

Life's Great Mysteries

Why is it so much harder to run 1.2 miles when you have a fever and a stomach ache than 2+ miles when you are healthy?

Why does my dryer insist on eating a sock a week?

Why is Pop Secret popcorn a thousand times better than Act II?

Why is it when I'm not really hungry and decide to have, oh I don't know, apple sauce and ice cream for lunch am I ravenous after eating my psuedo lunch?

Why did my VCR eat my Sound of Music tape and not any of the silly songs or Thomas videos we own?

Why!?

A real conversation between my mother and I:

Mom: Another American Girl catalog came. You better have a little girl so you can start buying American Girl stuff again.

Me: (inside my head: Why do I need a little girl to buy that stuff? Can't I buy it for me?)

Mom: If you are going to adopt you need to get on an adoption list. It takes a long time to adopt.

Me: (noting I never responded aloud to her comment and never mentioned adoption in this conversation. Quick decision. Agree and end conversation or argue with her) If you want to adopt an older child it doesn't take that long. (Damn it! Wrong choice).

Mom: Well, my cousin Shelly was on a list for a long time and she just got her daughter from China. And she isn't an infant. She's one!

Me: (Ohmygod! One, she's practically an adult, why did she need to be adopted) Ben got his kids fairly quickly because he was willing to adopt older kids and siblings (ha! Take that!)

Lather, rinse, repeat. Why did I answer the phone when I saw "Mom's Cell Phone" in the caller ID?

Darth Baby

Lately, Baba has had the tendency to fall asleep for the night any where but his bed. Tonight he fell asleep right by his door. How do I know this? Well, when I walked past his door, I heard very heavy breathing a la Darth Vader. I guess he is not over his cold.

Nicknames

My little family (Zippy, myself, Wili, and Baba) and my bigger family (parental units, sister, and soon to be brother-in-law) have never been much on using your real name. Real names are reserved for times when you are in trouble (I actually tested all the possible names for Baba by yelling them in an angry tone. Names that felt "good" yelling stayed on the list of names).

That being said, we have gotten very good at the giving and receiving on nicknames over the years. I have a friend whom we call "Porkchop" - the story behind that name? Well, out of the blue she said, "Quit picking on Porkchop." As far as we could tell no one had ever called her Porkchop before that day. Alas, it stuck. My sister will answer to: Sistra, Ditty, Little Ditty, and KaylaMcaShoebomb-Kackalackaticktock-Tickalickaboombomb-No-Nicknames. She created that name for herself while we were out shopping for track suits (you remember? Those ones made out of the windbreaker material. The tops and bottoms matched). It was the late 80s early 90s and we were so cool! Oops. I mean rad. We were so rad!

I have never called Zippy honey or dear or sweetheart or any other name that makes me gag. He has been Poonch, Hungie, Oreida Potato, Husband, the Yady, and Poonchie, among others. The cat, much to the dismay of my sister, goes by Mister Wili (she thinks its dumb that we named a female cat Wili and thinks its ever dumber that we call her Mister Wili. She is now an it, so there) or Silly-Wili-Ding-Dong or just plain "Ili!" (always Ili! with an exclamation point. We are always happy to see Wili because then we can point to her nose, eyes, ears, and mouth and try to stick our sticky little fingers in each part).

And let us not forget Baba. He started out as Zebulon (Zebbie), which evolved into Mister Babis, and then the boy (that makes total sense. We've got "Husband" "Wife" or "Mife" and the "Boy") and now we go by Trouble. In case you are curious, my nicknames include: Toey, Sarie, Hungie, Mife, the Yady, ZarahZou, and Sistra, among others.

We also have a tendency to make up names for things or make up words. There are, what a billion quadrillion megabillion and five words and that isn't enough for us to express ourselves.

But we've got a new word/nickname (stick with me, although all this information is interesting, I do have a point). The other night we were doing our nightly march to bedtime and Zippy was reading a Star Wars book to Baba and me. I was paying closer attention than Baba. Baba uses story time to wring 5 more minutes of havoc wrecking out of the day - basically he likes to rearrange his room before bedtime, creating an obsticle of painful toys for us to avoid during our pitch black trips to his bedside to locate a plug for him in the middle of the night.

Anyway, Zippy got to the part about Anakin's mother, Shmi and he pronounced "Shmi" incorrectly. Being the Star Wars fan (nerd) that I am, I corrected him. He then changed Shmi's name to "Shimmy-shimmy-sham-shung." Every time he came across Shmi he would insert Shimmy-shimmy-sham-shung. I was rolling on the ground laughing. A certain Baba couldn't figure out what I thought was so funny, but laughed anyway.

The moral of the story: Never mispronounce a Star Wars' character's name in front of a Star Wars fanatic and everything is funny when you haven't slept in a couple days.

Savings, Decisions, and the People's Court

Someone went to Rainbow foods and spent $35.45 and saved $56.96 so I'm a happy girl. I went to Target to celebrate. I spent under $10 and did not buy the super cut jogging pants or the semi-cute but super cheap dress I wanted. Double celebrate.

So, I must admit that I don't have a lot of direction in my life - never have. I was never one of those kids who knew they always wanted to be a garbage man when they grew up. Frankly, I was jealous of those kids. So I went to college because that's what you are supposed to do. I got my degree in English in three years because I'm a dumb girl (dumb in that I thought if I didn't hurry my happy self up and graduate with Zippy he wouldn't wait around for me). "So what are you going to with an English degree?" everyone asked. I didn't know, but I had a degree so someone is going to give me a job and that's that.

Not so much. I can't say that I've ever had a job that I thought I could keep for an extended and the longest I've ever worked at one job is just over a year. I get bored so I quit. I regret quitting, although most of my jobs have really sucked. And, even if I wanted to go back, I couldn't admit that or have the balls to call up a former employer and ask for my job back. I think if Nevilled called me up and asked me to come back I would seriously consider it (sans bond training, or course). I liked ZennieZou and I can handle just about anything with a friend by my side. Sigh. One day, I'll figure it out.

But, on another note, I am addicted to People's Court again. Damn it! I thought I got over that. Why oh why must our rabbit ears work upstairs well enough to get trashy TV?

Why, oh why, oh why, did I decide to start running again in October. I have lived in Minnesota for must of my life and generally it gets cold here in the winter. So what is a girl to wear to keep warm when she's out running and it is 40 below?

Is this my email?

I changed my Avatar this morning. Now everytime I log in to check my yahoo mail I think that I logged into someone else's email because the Avatar smiling at me isn't the one I'm used to seeing.

Blogging or Jogging?

I have always had a real love/hate relationship with running. I both love and hate to run. I love how I feel when I'm running, but I hate being sweaty and out of breath. I love running farther then I've ever run before, even if it is only a couple feet, but I hate how tired I am when I get done running. I love how fast running whips my flabby ass into shape, but I hate actually having to pound the pavement (my knees hate running, too).

Before Baba was born, I used to run a lot. Okay, I'll be honest. Before I got pregnant, I used to run a lot (after I got pregnant my exercise consisted of walking from the couch to the fridge and back and racing to the bathroom to park the tiger, technicolor yawn, vomit, puke, upchuck, spew, etc). After Baba was born, not so much. It is so hard to find the energy to do anything, let alone run.

But, lately, I've been running again. Hooray! And let me tell you, running is all mental. Meaning you have to be mental to run. There is something seriously wrong with me. Yesterday, I wanted to go out in the freezing cold and run my happy self around the block (the block being about a mile or so). And if Baba and Zippy hadn't so generously shared their colds with me, I'd be out running this afternoon instead of blogging.

So why do I run? First and foremost, it kicks my ass. I can feel a difference in my thighs after only a couple trips around the block. Second, I like the peace. The monotony of running gives me time to think. Third, while I'm running I'm not stressing or eating; I'm doing something constructive. Fourth, all the cool kids are doing it. Fifth, if I start running 5k's and other fun runs I'll have a neat collection of free T-shirts.

I wonder which burns more calories, blogging or jogging?

A Lonely Book in a Sea of Toys

My brother-in-law's knocked-up girlfriend's daughter's birthday party was Saturday night. I ended up buying her a boxset of books - "A Little Princess," "The Secret Garden," and "Anne of Green Gables." All books I loved growing up (2 out of 3 are still on my book shelf today) and she loves to read, which is great.

Our gift was the only gift she got besides toys and clothes. I'm a firm believer in the gift of books. Books won't break. You never really outgrow a good book (you just get faster at reading the story). The birthday girl, Zannah, is in second grade, but is an awesome reader. Last year, she was reading chapter books.

And, if she doesn't like the books, I included a gift receipt so she can return for store credit and pick out different books.

The Baba and I

Baba and I spent an hour (yes, an hour) at Petsmart today. We saw "ogs," "ilis," "irds," "ish," and various reptiles and hampsters (he doesn't have a word for reptiles - just grunts growls). We then met Ditty and Zippy for lunch at Wendy's (nutrious and delicious).

I tried to put Baba down for a nap this afternoon (not that he needed one or anything). He joyously played in his room for 45 minutes and then I decided, spud to napping - he isn't sleeping anyway. After his release from prision, he ran for 3 hours. I have never seen him put on so many miles in our little house as he did today.

Where does all his energy come from?

How much?

How much do you spend on a birthday present for, deep breath, your brother-in-law's knocked-up girlfriend's 9 year old daughter?

TV, How Could You?

We didn't let Baba watch any TV until he turned one. It wasn't that we had "do not cross" police tape in front of the TV, he just wasn't interested so we didn't push it. But then we discovered that Baby Einstein truly is baby-crack. He would watch the "moos," "baas," and "udges" while myself or Zippy held him in our laps, joyously getting another 20 to 30 minutes of much needed sleep. It was a beautiful thing.

Zippy found an article yesterday that Cornell University has research that links the rise in autism to kids watching too much TV. Of course, swallowing small bits of water at regular intervals causes cancer, but still. It is hard to know what to believe and what not to believe since people are so disparate to find a "reason" for autism that they link it to everything, including TV and vaccinations.

I guess the big question is, which is a bigger risk with worse results: Me not having 30 minutes of whine-free peace a day or the boy getting autism?

Disclaimer: I am not in any way making light of the struggle that autistic children and their parents face every day. Nor do I dare minimize my need for whine-free space. It is a humdinger of a pickle.

Pleasant Pheasant and Gross Grouse

Pheasant season opened yesterday, I only know this because the opening dates of various hunting seasons (grouse, goose, early goose, deer, pheasant, duck, etc) were more important than Christmas day growing up (I believe Christmas is in December sometime?).

Because my parents firmly believe they will implode if they go more than a week without seeing Baba, we headed out to my grandparents farm so they could see Baba and Baba could wear himself out by running around all day.

Worked like a charm. Baba didn't seem to mind the freezing temperatures, he was too busy trying to chase down the "ili's," his word for cat. Why would a poor defenseless little kitty run away from someone like Baba toddling towards him?

Baba is now sleeping peacefully (hooray!) and I am trying to reach $20 worth of picture stuffs so I get free shipping from dotphoto.com. Who knew spending $20 could be so much work?

Speaking of work, we've been working very hard to get Baba to make our sign for Poonchies - you put your index fingers together and making kissing noises. Moving your fingers against each other obscenely is optional. He is finally getting it down! Our plan is to have him walk to the end of the aisle next summer at Poonch II and Ditty's wedding and make the sign.

Raindrops on Roses

The funny thing about depression is that just when you think that being depressed is so last week/last month/last year/etc, it comes knocking at your door and BOOM! its boxes of kleenexes and self-doubt waiting for you in bed. Depression is a bully - it increases it's self-esteem by making you feel bad. What a jerk! I am so not inviting depression to my birthday part.

The last couple weeks have been tough, not because anything specifically has happened, just because depression came around (that and Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun has been hiding behind a tree). Despite the fact that I have broken several threatening email chain letters lately an amazing thing happened a couple days ago. I got an email from a really good friend who I hadn't talked to in a couple years. And she called tonight and we talked for over an hour. It was like we hadn't been out of touch for 2 days, much less 2 years.

Leaving Cleveland to move back here was one of the hardest things I've ever done and not a day goes by when Zippy or I don't mention wanting to move back home.

But, I'm in such a good mood that I'm starting a list of my favorite things - the things that make me happy:

1. Phone calls/emails from "long-last" friends.
2. Snow - the clean white kind, not the run over by 5 semi's kind.
3. Vacations!
4. Human Anatomy.
5. Sleeping in.
6. Mornings when Baba wakes up with a "Momma!" instead of tears.
7. Chocolate.
8. Reading blogs.
9. Good books, especially when I have the time to read said good book from cover to cover.
10. Making Baba giggle.
11. Lazy days.
12. PJs until noon.
13. Cuddling with my husband and watching dumb movies.
14. Bad Sci-fi movies.
15. My friends.
16. Writing.
17. My cat.
18. Going to my grandparents house (tomorrow!).
19. Christmas season.
20. Weekends were we have nothing to do.
21. Grocery shopping.
22. Coupons!
23. Chinese food.
24. Eating in general.
25. Stepping on the scale and realizing I've lost any amount of weight.
25b. Putting on a pair of pants that cut off the circulation to my legs a year ago because they had "shrunk" and the pants now fit (how did they un-shrink?).
26. The cabin.
27. Sleeping.

I'm too tired to think of anything else (it's 10:30! It is way past my bed time).

Coupon Queen

My name is Gaft Girl and I have a problem. Deep breath. I love coupons. I have been known, on occasion, to buy multiple Sunday papers when there is a good coupon (case in point, last weekend. There was a $3 off a box of Luvs diapers. The $1.75 was totally worth it to get a second coupon). I also have my mother and grandmother save their coupons for me.

My second, perhaps more disturbing problem is this: I love to grocery shop. I'm serious. I love trying to get as many groceries for as little as possible (I never spend more than a $1 a serving for a meal). I spend hours (yes, plural) working on my list, scouring the grocery ads, and comparing prices. It is probably a disease. But I can feed my family of 3 for less than $200 a month and I probably have enough groceries in storage that we could go at least a month without buying anything but milk (of course, if we bought a cow.....).

Next to Sundays (new grocery ads), Wednesdays are my favorite day. Why? It is double coupon day, silly. Double coupon day ranks right up there with Nudie Magazine Day (Billy Madison), Christmas, and my birthday. It may even outrank Christmas and Nudie Magazine Day.

On what other day is it possible to exercise my coupon prowess? I get to chose the 5 coupons I want doubled (my suggestion is to pick the dollar coupons, but that's my humble opinion) and as long as I spend $25 they are doubled.

The key is to spend exactly $25, before coupons, and then after doubling and other coupons the weeks worth of groceries are down to $15 or so. Hooray. And never, ever shop on an empty stomach (a Chinese food buffet with Zennie Zou certainly nixed any emptiness I had in my stomach today!)

I must admit that today I didn't quite ring up at my usual $25 mark. My total was $40, which is the most I've spent on groceries in a long time. But, considering I have $12 off my next grocery order and a $10 mail in rebate, I think going over cost me less in the long run. Plus, I got to meet the worlds tallest man.

If I wasn't happily married, I would probably marry Rainbow Foods. Or Giant Eagle.

Stay Away Winter!

What are we going to do when it is too cold to play outside? Somebody loves being outside. The first thing we do in the morning is look for the moon. Then Baba spends his time divided between eating breakfasts (yes, plural) and pulling us to the front door to try to get us to open it.

He was not a happy camper the few mornings that it has been too cold (and I have been too lazy) to go for our usual walk.

But at least yesterday was nice. We walked, or attempted to walk, to the grocery store. On the way to the grocery store are two parks. We made it past one park, but the other park proved too tempting for some toddlers and Baba took of (as in removed himself from the stroller and started running) toward the park. I followed Baba and Zippy continued to the grocery store.

BFF

My BFF from 3rd grade, Zhastity (on the left - can you tell that me and my monkey arms took the picture?), was up from Kansas this weekend for a mutual friend, Zyan's, wedding. Zhastity and I went to elementary, middle, and started high school together. The summer after 9th grade her family moved to Kansas, but we kept in touch. She was one of my maids of honor when I got married.

At Zyan's wedding, there were all sorts of Beckerites that I knew in high school, but never really hung out with. I spent more time talking to them last night than I did in 4 years of high school. Its really weird what changes can happen in 6 years and what never changes.

I also saw my friend Ebob at the wedding. I really miss Ebob. He could always make me laugh and helped me survive a horrible senior year of high school. The only time I have ever gotten in a food fight was with Ebob, his car "The Ho-da" (it was a Honda that he scratched the "n" off of) and my car, Eleanore. Pizza, if left too long on your car, will do damage. May Eleanore and The Ho-da rest in peace.

From left to right: Little Ditty, Zhas, and me.

Zhas and I are kind of strange because there are not too many pictures of the two of us together. There is, however, an amazing picture that was taken moments after Zippy and my wedding of the two of us hugging.

My favorite picture, next to the hug, is the three of us playing "doctor" after I got my tonsils out. There is also the picture of the two of us on my grandpa's 3 wheeler a million years ago. I always thought when we grew up we'd be next door neighbors.

Zhas is in and out of my life a lot - that happens when you live so far away. But she's always been there for the important stuff - my wedding, high school graduation, Baba's birth. I'm really glad she was able to come up for the short trip (she got up here Saturday around 1 and left this morning around 8). It was nice to see her. True friendships last forever and friends are only a phone call/email (this is the 2000s!) away.

Chapters 7 & 8

Chapters 7 & 8 are Male Reproductive system and Female Reproductive system, respectively. Since I have used my reproductive system once, I am fairly certain I know what my parts are and how they generally work. I am not a male nor have I ever been one, but after reading the introduction to Chapter 7, I now know that "the function of the male reproductive system is to reproduce."

Um, okay. Here I was thinking this anatomy stuff was hard. It's obvious that the function of the male reproduction system is reproduction needs to be explained, but something like "Phimosis" would never need an explanation. (If you really must know, phimosis is congenital condition of tightening of the prepuce around the glans penis so that the foreskin cannot be retracted. Which took me several hours of research to figure that out.)

It's a miracle!

A certain small child has been waking up pre-buttcrack-thirty (before 5:00 am) and waking up screaming for a couple hours during the night for the past couple weeks. That is until this morning when, miracle of miracles, he slept until 7 am. And, will wonders never cease, he slept 12 hours without waking up screaming.

Life is good when you've had 9 hours of sleep. Almost makes a person consider having another kid (or cat or puppy).

Wee Willie Winkie

I'm sure in 10 to 15 years, Baba will be mortified that his mother shared this fact, but we chose not to have Baba circumcised (he'll also probably be angry that I let him use tampon boxes at Target for rattles, but what can you do?). Why? Well, I think it is kind of cruel (would you want your business mutilated?) and I didn't want to subject Baba to a surgery that wasn't medically necessary.

So why am I sharing this? Well, fast-forward 18 months to his 18th month well-baby check.

Dr: Have you noticed anything unusual about Baba's penis?

Me: (thinking - Don't have one, wouldn't recognize unusual or usual anatomy) No, why.

Dr: Well, I can't retract his foreskin and I believe the hole may be too small to allow urine to escape. Tell me, when he urinates is it a steady stream or is it like when you put your thumb on a garden hose?

Me: (thinking - he is still in diapers, for Pete's sake. I don't usually let him run around without one.) I haven't really noticed.

Dr: We'll have to keep an eye on the hole in his foreskin. He made need to be circumcised.

Me: (thinking - Um, ow!)

All of the males I have told that Baba may now need a circumcision have grabbed their business and said "Ow." We have yet to determine if his pee-hole is the proper size or if he'll just grow out of it (into it? I suppose if his business were to shrink, he might be okay).

I had my first anatomy test today; my brain is fried. I did okay (92.5%) on the first part. Not so okay (66.66%) on the second part. Looks like studying the arm and heart again is in my future. But not tonight. Its off to TV and booze.

Ouch!

After 2.5 hours of LD testing (dyslexia, ADHD, ADD, and other fun labels), an anatomy test tomorrow, and more LD testing tomorrow after my anat test, I'm wrecked and my brain hurts.

Duluth

I went up to Duluth this weekend. I had desinged some wedding invitations for Zippy's cousin and I wanted to give them to his fiance, Zindsey. I also went to visit my good friend Roblyn the Goblyn. I love her! We went to Michaels, some scrapbook place, and Chinese food!!!

Very few people will check your teeth for lunch leftovers for you.



I'm invited to an adult cocktail party! Roblyn and I were very busy making the invites. What do I wear?

Before and After

As promised before and after pictures of our casa.

Before our home makeover we had white walls with lots of gouges and nail pops and other fun things. We also had stained up carpet, which the cat and the boy know nothing about.
This is a picture or our dining room walls. I'm not sure why I took it, but apparently I thought it was a neat picture or something.

During the remodeling process we learned a couple things. Number one, our house was more crappily constructed that we originally thought (if the wall jutts out in front of the door, no problem, hammer it back into place. see pic) and number two, moving almost all of your belongings in the garage for a few days does wonders in squelching your desire to move. We can probably live here another year.



















And now, the moment you've all (my entire vast readership) have been waiting for, the results. I painted the kitchen a rusty nail red and the dinning room/living room a color called dipped in honey. Our floors are Hemse Oak Stave from IKEA. Pretty much they rock.

Getting rid of the old flooring and other construction waste did not involve me taking a stealth trip to the dumpster down the street in the freezing rain because a certain poopsquirt said that during the monsoon would be a good time to dump the waste because no one would be dumb enough to go out in the rain. He was wrong by the way. There was some punk kid playing in the rain and one of our neighbors was having a party, so I wasn't the only one "dumb" enough to go out in the rain. But I heard that the outstanding citizen that less than legally dumped her garbage in the dumpster used her father's truck so the cops can't possibly trace it back to her. Or him.


The boy and Mister Wili enjoying our new house. Our rug is also from IKEA.

Banned Book Week

September 23 through the 30th is Banned Book Week. More than a book a day faces expulsion from free and open public access in U.S. schools and libraries every year. There have been more than 8,700 attempts since the American Library Association began electronically compliling and publishing information on book challenges in 1990.

I am not going to crawl on my soap box and tell you why book banning (which leads to book burning, which I am also against despite the fact that I really enjoy burning a good couch now and then) is bad. I am just going to publish the list of the 100 Most Frequently Challeneged Books of 1990-2000 and you can think about how many of your favorite novels/authors are on that list and what you would have missed if you had not gotten to (or been forced to) read that novel.

The 100 Most Frequently Challenged Books of 1990–2000


Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
Daddy's Roommate by Michael Willhoite
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain *
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck *
Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling *
Forever by Judy Blume *
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor *
Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Giver by Lois Lowry
It's Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
The Color Purple by Alice Walker
Sex by Madonna
Earth's Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
Go Ask Alice by Anonymous *
Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
The Goats by Brock Cole
Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
Blubber by Judy Blume *
Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
Final Exit by Derek Humphry
The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood *
Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
What's Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee *
Beloved by Toni Morrison *
The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton *
The Pigman by Paul Zindel
Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
Deenie by Judy Blume
Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes *
Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein *
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
Cujo by Stephen King
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl *
The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
Ordinary People by Judith Guest
American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
What's Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume *
Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
Fade by Robert Cormier
Guess What? by Mem Fox
The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney *
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Lord of the Flies by William Golding *
Native Son by Richard Wright
Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women's Fantasies by Nancy Friday
Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
Jack by A.M. Homes
Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
Carrie by Stephen King
Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume *
On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
Family Secrets by Norma Klein
Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
The Dead Zone by Stephen King
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain *
Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
Private Parts by Howard Stern
Where's Waldo? by Martin Hanford
Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
Sex Education by Jenny Davis
The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell *
View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

* means I've read.

Reading this list makes me think to things. One, WTF did someone try to ban that book? And two, I'm going to use this as my reading list for the next couple months and try to figure out why someone would want these books banned.

Balancing Act

Not only do I heart hearts, I also heart balancing my check book. There, I said it. I heart balancing my check book. Does this make me a nerd? Probably. Do I care? Not really.

I love making all the numbers from the month add up and work out to exactly what I have written down - when the total from the front of the statement matches the total on your register - that makes me very happy.

Which is why I am currently not happy with ZCF Bank. My statement was supposed to come out today. I've spent all day looking forward to coming home and balancing my check book. But, ZCF hasn't published my statement so I can't.

I'm so disappointed. Maybe tomorrow!

Flare Hours

Apparently lab hours are like flare, when they say you need two hours a week for a certain class that means two hours minimum. You want to express yourself, don't you?

Next semester lab minimum lab hours bump up to 6 hours a week. Yeah, 6 hours minimum. And that's lab hours outside of lab. That's lab is open from 4-10 weekends and Saturdays from 8:30 until 10 and Sundays from 8:30 until 6 so your happy self better be there for 6 hours minimum.

Okay, so I have classes, labs inside of class, open lab hours, homework, and somewhere in there I need to have a job that makes a minimum of $150 gross a week to pay for daycare. Perhaps I should wait until Baba is in state funded day-care (elementary school) to go back to school.

Lab hours could have been mentioned at orientation. This information would have been useful before I paid my tuition.

Floored

Wow, let me tell you, wow. Today Poonch II, Zippy, Poopsquirt, and myself installed our new IKEA laminate floors downstairs. They look amazing and we did the whole thing for $600. Plus, we overestimated on fiberboard and flooring so we returned some stuff this evening and IKEA gave us $88 back. Which, since we had already spent the money, was free money. We bought two new rugs.

The other amazing part of the day is discovering how crappily our house was built. Sheetrock overhanging the door frame because you didn't measure? Bash it in with a hammer and cover it with trim, no one will ever know. No time to level or check the plumbness of the wall? No problem! Eyeball it. Cement settled weird on the slab? Why worry? Patch it with quick dry, who's going to see it?

Needless to say we will not be choosing this builder in the future. Pictures of our fanastic new house (a downstairs makeover is practically new, right?) to come soon.

I heart hearts

Despite yesterday being a pretty craptacular day over all, two very cool things did happen. Number one I get to play with pig and sheep hearts (funny, I will not eat either of those animals but I am perfectly okay with playing with their body parts) and number two I got to observe an echo.

Watching the heart pump was incredible. Amazing. I heart hearts.

I am angry woman here me roar.

Why does everything I get excited about turn out to be the complete opposite of what I'm expecting i.e. bad and stinky?

More therapy for me I fear.

Burn, Baby, Burn

Painting for 6 hours (which I did today) burns 2,074 calories (http://www.healthstatus.com/calculate/cbc). So, I could be smart and just bank the calories - that's almost a pound worth - but I think it would be more fun to have some delicious chips and dip.

Yeah, chips is definetly the way to go. Yum.

My helper boys and cross-dressing son

Tonight while I was getting ready to paint tomorrow, guess what my boys were doing?

Yeah, they were supervising.

After class today, Zerica, one of the girls in the program with me, and I went to IKEA to pick up our flooring. She asked me what I was doing between class and lab and I said going to IKEA. She thought it sounded like fun to ride along, so she did. I needed 16 boxes of Hemse Oak Stave flooring and 16 boxes I did get.

Who would have thought 16 boxes of laminate could take up so much room? Of course, they didn't fit in my truck because my truck was too skinny (Why didn't my husband say something like, "Take my car when you get the flooring, it should go in easier in my car?" Oh wait. He did). So plan B was to wedge it in my back seat. Zerica had to sit with her knees around her neck on the way back to campus because her seat was all the way to the front. It was pretty funny. She probably won't be my friend any more. At least I've got my lunch date with ZennieZou (as soon as we decide on a date, of course) to look forward to.

I was spot-priming the walls tonight and Zippy told me to come quick and bring the camera. I walked into our bedroom and this is what I saw:


I'm pretty liberal, so I'm not too worried. And anyone who is that proud of his milk-belly deserves to strut around in Strawberry Shortcake slippers. And, as the poopsquirt says, "Pink is a boy color, blue is a girl color."

The wonderful world of color

After the whole house sinking adventure, we finally got our settlement check from our construction company (we opted out of letting them replace the floor - we'll do it ourselves, thank you very much). We are buying laminate from IKEA, which my father, Zippy, Poonch II, and I will be installing this weekend (I will also be leading several lectures in anatomy because I will need to study while laying the flooring).

Zippy and I were discussing yesterday how much easier it would be to paint before the new floors went down. We wouldn't have to worry about spilling on the new laminate, etc, etc, etc. So we've picked out colors "Dipped in Honey" for the living room and part of the dining room and "Rusty Nail" for the kitchen. The actual name of the color escapes me at the moment, but I thought "Rusty Nail" sounded good.

Maybe when I grow up, I should be a paint color namer. Rusty Nail. Pus Green. Vomitous Yellow. Period Red. Bruise Purple. Something to think about anyway.

So guess who will be painting the living room, dining room, and kitchen on Wednesday....

The Problem with Toys

To say that Baba has a lot of toys would be an understatement. He has enough toys for a small army of snot-nosed babies and/or toddlers. I wish I could say that he is a perfect toddler: he plays with one toy at a time and returns the current toy to the toy box before choosing another toy. The truth is all of the toys must be removed from the toy box before any decision can be reached regarding which toy to play with.

Until today, this had not been to much of a problem. Oh sure, I've stepped on a fair share of trucks, duplos, farmers, tractors (tractors hurt theworst), and farm animals. But tonight, I walked into Baba Knievel's Wonder Trike of Death and Destruction and broke off half of my toenail.

On the plus side, I didn't swear out loud or get any blood on our carpet. I figure that's a pretty decent accomplishment. Much more worthwhile than the 8 hours of homework I did today.

Nickle Dickle Days

Ditty and Poonch II came down last night and babysat for us so we could go out for Zippy's 26th birthday (we went to Buca's and then to IKEA where we spent $230, thanks for asking). This morning we got up and went downtown for Nickle Dickle Days.

Yes, Nickle Dickle Days. I don't know why or who came up with choosing Dickle as the only word that would rhyme with Nickle, but someone did. So, what is Nickle Dickle days? After attending the event, I'm still not sure. There was a car show, which Baba, Zippy, and Poonch II attended. Ditty and I went to the scrapbook store where we purchased paper for a nickle! Hooray!

Then we went to Pizza Ranch for lunch where the lunch buffet (pizza, salads, chicken, potatoes, etc) was $5.55 a person. We walked past a bar with $.55 domestic taps. The candy store had candy for $.05. The library had a book sale, but no books were for a nickle, apparently they didn't get that memo.

What people in small towns do for excitement.

The Deal with the Driver....

Baba is obsessed with anything that has wheels, makes a vroom noise, and has a sterring wheel. Every morning when we get into the car I let him climb from the passenger side to the driver side. Once there he can press three buttons (yes, I have driven to my destination before realizing that my brights were on in the middle of the morning) and then into his car seat he goes.














He's happy because he gets to "drive" for three buttons and I'm happy because I know he is content and not running into the street while I load the car up. But, he always is asking me when he can drive for real. So we made a deal. He can't drive until he is two or his feet reach the pedals.

Hopefully by the time his feet actually reach the pedals, he will have forgotten our deal and will be content waiting until 15 or 16.

Human Anat

I bought my human anatomy book today. Techinically this is the second time I bought it since the stupid jerk I bought it from on half.com never sent it (as far as I know - I haven't received it at any rate) and won't answer my emails asking if they shipped it. I couldn't wait any longer. I'm already a week behind (yikes!) in anat so I bent over and paid the bookstore $143 for the book I paid $90 for (but never got. I guess technically, I've paid $233 for this book, but when you are rich like me, what is money?).

Besides getting to pay for this book twice, the best thing about the Anat book is it weighs about 40 pounds. I wish I was joking on the weight, but my back says otherwise.

Tomorrow the yahoos come to repair the 37 nail pops in our bathroom. And its double coupon day at Rainbow and double homework day at home. Hooray! I think I will be checking my email and doing other non-related homework activites tomorrow.

Nigh-Night

Why is it that the speed of a baby is proportional to the nakedness and wetness of said child? Baba can run 100 miles an hour when he is wet and naked, but only 57 miles an hour when he is fully clothed. Almost every night he escapes out of the bathroom after his tub, dripping and naked, and takes off for the bedroom, breaking the sacred "no naked weenies out of the bathroom" rule. He is by far the worst perpetrator of this rule.

Tonight after his bath (after we cornered the naked wonder in our bedroom) and after he was fully clothed and dried, Zippy said it was time for bed. Baba looked at me, started waving, and said, "Nigh-Night." And then took off running for his bed. He loves his big boy bed with the Spiderman sheets. He also loves pretending to fall asleep so we leave his room and he gets up to play. He hasn't learned that he has to play quietly to avoid detection.

Yes, I am avoiding doing my homework and blogging instead. Thanks for asking.

Banana

Baba learned a new word today: Banana. So between bird, Wili, go, more, read, book, Momma, Dadda, Pudge (parent's dog), dog, yeah, sure, no, moo, baa, baby, eat, and some other words I'm forgetting, he can practically speak English.

We took him to get his 18th month pictures today. We just took him to a certain store that starts with an S and ends with an ears. He was more interested in wrecking havoc than getting his pictures taken, but we ended up with 6 really cute ones. And $174 later they were ours to take home. Hooray!

Books & Homework

What did I do today? Homework. What are my plans for tomorrow? Homework. Sunday? Dinner with Ditty's future in-laws and probably, for a delicious change of pace, homework.

And to put me in an even better mood, one of my text books which I have been charged $90 for has not arrived. I have contacted the seller thrice with no response. I'm so excited. The first time I use half.com and I get burned. I want my book, but if this particular seller has no intention of sending my book then I want my money. Fair is fair. Neither one of us should get both the book and the money. Sometimes I really hate people.

Now, I'm off to shower and then hopefully stay up past 8 o'clock. I am so tired. I guess 8 hours of homework will do that to a girl.

Mount Kitty

One of the best purchases I ever made was a cat tree for Mister Wili. We bought it as a Christmas present for our furry baby 3 years ago and since then, she has spent countless hours sitting on the top perch watching the world go by and chattering at various birds and other fauna. I never dreamed it would become Baba's favorite toy. I believe I have mentioned that Baba likes to climb, a lot. He is very adept at stacking various things (couch cushions, toys, rocking chairs, etc) in front of the window in order to climb up and get a better view and saw the cat tree as the perfect ladder. It took a few tries before he was able to scale Mount Kitty, but he was not afraid of the danger he was facing.What an honor to be the first man, woman, and/or child to scale Mount Kitty. The glory was too much to pass up.
Eventually, success. Baba GoiGoi goes down in the history book as the first human ever to reach the summit of Mount Kitty and the Mister Wili is left to sulk under the bed because there truly is no place left where she can sleep in peace away from the boy.
Another "Wictory"!

Medical Term of the Day

This one is too good to pass up:

cranial capacity
The cubic content of the skull obtained by determining the cubage of small shot, seeds, or beads required to fill the skull.

How does one go about determining the amount of small shot, seeds, or beads required to fill the skull? Does the one to be measured (measuree) tilt their head to the side and the measurer begins stuffing small shot, seeds, or beads into their skull via the ear and nose?

Can I be the measurer rather than the measuree?

What did you learn in school today?

I learned to speak with a Russian accent.

My physics prof has a very, very, very heavy Russian accent. After listening to him for 2 hours all I took away from my first day of physics is the accent. Am I in trouble?

Pre-homework homework?

Classes haven't even started yet and I've been doing homework all day. I have a class to test out of tomorrow (hopefully, keep your fingers crossed) and a anat packet that is due. How can they assign pre-class homework? I don't believe that's fair.

Plus, my human anat book hasn't come yet. I ordered it over 2 weeks ago, so I'm less than thrilled with that. What is taking so long!?

For ZennieZou

My journey in pictures:

All of my non-plastic friends were too busy working, in school, etc to drive to Cleveland with me, so I brought my Glitter Girlz bobble head. Here we are at a gas station in Wisconsin.

Later, my Glitter Girlz bobble head, who I named Bobbi, got hungry, so we stopped at a McDonalds somewhere in Illinois. She made me order french fries when I would have been quite happy without.

I showed Bobbi to Zabby (my friend, Zeagan's, adorable daughter). She thought she broke Bobbi because her head bobbled. I managed to convince Zabby otherwise.

Below is a picture of Bobbi standing in front of another gas station in Wisconsin on the way home. Bobbi and I were both glad to get home. She's too much of a yes-man for my taste. Everytime I asked her a question she would just nod her head.

ZennieZou, I hope you appreciate the image of me stopping my car and taking pictures of a bobble head at each stop.

There's no place like home....

The truth is, I'm kind of a home-body, homey. Most of the time I would rather sit home with a good book than go out. That being said, I had a blast in Cleveland. And the best part is 28 hours of driving in 96 hours gave me a lot of time to think (and a stomach ache from all the junk food I ate. My stomach cannot handle fried food any more. Darn it anyway).

The bests and worsts of the trip:

Best Price for gas: $2.41/gallon - Cleveland
Worst Price for gas: $3.19/gallon - Chicago (the most I paid was $2.96/gallon)

Best trip time-wise: Trip home: 13 hours and 15 minutes
Worst trip time-wise: Trip out: 14 hours on the nuts

Worst toll: $5.45 for the privilege of driving on the Ohio Turnpike
Best toll: The toll that you no longer have to pay on I-39 just south of Rockford

Worst food: Nothing - I enjoyed it all!
Best food: Mongolian BBQ. Mussel and scallop stir fry, yum!

Worst overall moment: When my check engine light came on about 3 hours into the drive home.
Best overall moment: When I faith-healed my car and the check engine light went off (I'm certain my car is fixed).

Best book on tape: The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin (love, love, love, love, love this book. Zennie Zou if you haven't read this book you should)
Worst book on tape: The Dragon Mistress by Margaret Weis (this may be unfair. I wasn't in the mood to listen to a book today. I was in the mood to give a concert to my Glitter Girl Bobble-head who accompanied me on my trip....more on this later)

Most exciting discovery: I can trip from Minneapolis to Cleveland without a map and/or written down directions.
What I don't want to discover: How many hours of my life I've spent driving between Minneapolis and Cleveland (if you must know, I estimate 364 hours, which is over 15 days).

I play the license plate game (simplified rules: look for different state's/province's license plates and right them down when you see them. Goal: see all 50 states and DC in one trip. The closest I've ever been was 47). I did see a new one - Nova Scotia. I was very excited.

One of these times I'm going to get pulled over for speeding up to look at a plate. I can see it now:

Officer: Did you know you were going 85 mph back there?
Me: Yes sir. I saw a license plate I didn't recognize and I had to speed up so I could see where it was from. I'm only 11 plates away from seeing them all! I didn't want to miss one.

Do you think that will get me out of a ticket?

Anyway, shout out to the following states and/or provinces: Don't you people ever leave your states? I didn't see you on the way out or the way home and I drove about 1600 miles this week. WTF?

Alaska
Delaware
Hawaii (I have seen two Hawaii plates in my life)
Louisiana
New Mexico
Nevada
South Carolina
Vermont
New Brunswick
Newfoundland (Haven't seen this one)
Northwest Territories
Nunavit (My life will be complete if I ever see this one)
Prince Edward Island (Never seen this one)
Yukon (never seen this one)

My father plays the road kill game. You tally the road kill you see by category: Deer, skunk, raccoon, squirrel, unidentified pile of guts and fur. I always forget to keep track of this until I'm halfway there. By my observation, deer were by far the most popular thing to hit on the roads I traveled on.