Mom! My socks are stuck!

My baby's in Trouble!

I was in the bathroom brushing my hair this morning when I heard Baba yell, "Mom!!! My baby's in trouble!"

Since I didn't hear Rudy crying and my house is perfectly child proofed (and adult proofed - the locks on my hutch are a bizatch to get into), I wasn't too worried. But, being the good Mom I am, I went down the hall to Baba's room to investigate.

Me: What's wrong, Baba?

Baba: She's 'tanding!

I look and see that Rudy is 'tanding in the middle of the boy's room. Not quite sure how she got into a 'tanding position because there was nothing to pull up any where around her.....

Me: That's okay. She's practising standing.

Baba: I don't like it. She could fall and get hurt.

What is he going to do when "his" baby is ready for school?

On the coldest day in 5 years....

Generally, it is an up hill battle to get Baba out of his pajamas. He is just not interested in getting his pajama's off because pj's are so comfy, cozy, and other things among his 9,574 other excuses for not getting dressed.

I was eating my Kix and Reece's Puffs mix for breakfast this morning (I highly recommend mixing cereal. Yum!) and I turned around. The boy was darn near naked. I laughed so hard cereal almost came out of nose.

I said, "Why are you naked?"
Baba said, "I'm not naked. I have my undies and socks on."

I said, "Why are you in your undies and socks."
Baba said, "Because my pj's came off!"


Its the coldest day of the year and my child is running around in his under-roos. He says he's not cold because he is a polar bear, but he did mention the chair was cold when he stole my cereal and sat down to eat it.

PS I brought down clothes for him to wear and have been nagging him to get dressed for the past 30 minutes or so. Now his clothes are missing and he isn't sure where they went. I can only conclude his clothes have a mind of their own.

Sinner!

Yesterday afternoon my phone rang with an unknown number. I usually don't pick up if I don't recognize the number, but it was a local area code and River City Theater has about 14 different phone numbers they call me from, so I answered thinking that our rehearsal location/date/production had been changed. Again.

It wasn't River City Theater.

It was our pastor. My first that was, "Oh crap! He's going to ask why we haven't been in church since Christmas Eve. Really!? I can't miss a few Sundays without the pastor giving me a call!? What's up with that? I'm sorry we ever started going to that church."

He was actually calling to remind me that registration for Grandma's Marathon opens today. We spoke for a few minutes with no comment on our spotty church attendance, just a pleasant conversation on the joys of training for a marathon. He said he was filling out his registration and thought of me and how busy you are with little kids and thought I might have forgotten that registration opened today. I thanked him for thinking of me. All in all, it was a pleasant conversation. Although, I think he muttered, "sinner" under his breath when he hung up.

5 pieces of bread

There were 5 pieces of bread consumed at my house this morning. I had none, the girl had 1, and the boy had 4. Yes, 4. Two toasted with jelly, two without toasted but with jelly.

So, to the dude at the food store with his snide comment of "Like bread, do you?" upon seeing the 6 loaves of bread in my cart. No, I don't really like bread, but my kids do. And as an FYI the 2 gallons of milk I bought, sir, will last about a week.

Baba Babysits

Rudy is obsessed with the steps and is a quick little bugger so you have to watch her constantly. You turn your back for 2 seconds and she's halfway up. Baba is obsessed with "watching" his baby and loves volunteering to "watch" her so I can go to the bathroom, start supper, make a snack, etc.

Baba wanted a snack this afternoon and volunteered to watch his sister while I fixed his 87th snack of the day. I said okay, but to let me know if she started on the steps. He agreed.

I fixed his snack and came around the corner. "Where's your sister?" I asked.

"On the 'teps!" Baba yelled.

I said, "I thought you were watching her."

He said, "I was. But I needed a break."

He had been "watching" her for about 30 seconds.

I rescued Rudy from the steps and they happily went back to playing with the cat toy (which I got on clearance at Target for 29 cents. Next year, Santa is bringing boxes, cat toys, and more boxes).

Grocery Store Math

Now I remember what I was really going to blog about.....

I was at the grocery store today and came across this math problem:

128 ounces of OJ for 2.99

OR

64 ounces of OJ on sale for 2 for $6

Do I need to slow down? Should I repeat the question? It was a tough choice. I had to call my dad.

Someday....(insert lyrics from your fav song with someday in it)

To quote ZennieZou, "I've a bad blog keeper-upper guyer (I'm adding guyer because that's what the boy would say)."

My poor neglected blog has taken a backseat to my new hobby, reading several books at once. For example, I'm reading: America, the book by Jon Stewart, Pollyanna by some lady, and Harry Pothead and the Half Blood Prince by another lady. America and 1/2 Blood by choice, Pollyanna because I'm auditioning next week and have very vague memories of the movie with Haley Mills.

I have really cute holiday pictures of the kids. Someday (July is looking pretty open) they'll get posted. Until then, wish me luck auditioning - here's hoping I don't get confused and start acting out scenes from Harry Potter.

Santa

Baba has been very concerned about everyone, not just him, getting presents lately. He was quite worried when, as of last Friday, there was NOTHING for me under the tree. Zippy took him shopping so he no longer has that to worry about.

But today at Target, he asked me what Santa was bringing me. I said I didn't know and asked what he thought Santa should bring me. He thought for a moment and said, "a new shirt without holes and new pants."

So, my three year old has noticed that my favorite sweatshirt has a hole in the sleeve. I was kind of embarrassed at first, but there's a good chance I won't stop wearing it. I really like it. I hope Baba isn't too disappointed when Santa brings me Season 2 of Ducktales instead of a new shirt.

Angry Boy

The boy was angry at me the other day. He glared at me and said, "MOMUA HAROLD!!"

I laughed.

To my dear friend, ZennieZou

My dearest ZennieZou,

If you EVER give me another Danielle Steel book to read I may have to stop being your friend. I really tried to like her because she came highly recommended from you, but I can't.

I read that one about the kids on the Titanic for you. By the end of the book, I had wished they had all gone down with the ship.

I am currently trying to read Sisters. I've had it for 3 years and I feel it is time to return it. The English major in me won't let me return a book I haven't read.

So far, it is harder for me to get into than when I read Canterbury Tales in Olde Englishe in college. By the second chapter, I was skipping paragraphs. By the third, I was skipping pages. By the fourth, I was hoping they would all get hit with an meteorite and then next 200 pages would be "The End" written over and over and over. No such luck.

I keep reading, however. I trust your judgement and am hoping by the end of the book it redeems itself (or they all die in horrible, bloody, gory, etc accidents that make me feel that reading it has worthwhile. Its like when you are stuck in traffic and think "Man, there better be a BIG accident to cause these delays.").

But, I really like being your friend so no more Danielle Steel, okay? Every other book you have ever sent me has been readable and enjoyable. If you send me more Danielle Steel, I may have to tell Dumbly you are not setting your thermostat within 10 degrees of the outside temperature.

Thanks,

ZarahZou

PS stupid snow. I'm really bummed about cancelling our play date. Wanna have a play date in Florida?

Same tree, same crap, I mean, same BEAUTIFUL stuff

A couple weekends ago, we decorated our parents Christmas tree. I do believe we out did ourselves this year.

We found the beautiful Styrofoam ball with three dots of glitter left that my mom always tries to hid from us. She said, "What until you have kids..." I have kids. One of whom made a beautiful blue glitter Styrofoam ball that he promptly dropped on the floor and got glitter in between my floor boards that I'll never get out. The ball is hanging on our tree and the boy is forbidden to touch it, to think about touching it, or look at it.

Even better than the Styrofoams ball (what says Christmas more than glittery Styrofoam?) was this yellow ornament I found in the box. Apparently, its actually a twist-tie, but it was in the box so it was fair game.

And this ornament I found in the box that my mom said, "Don't go in that box. There's just junk in there." Open invitation. If she really didn't want us in that box, she wouldn't have said anything about its contents.

My new concept in decorating - try the ornament out for the season, if you don't like it, take it back. Just leave it in the bag! As an added bonus, you'll never have to dust your ornaments, just shake the bag off at the end of the season.

After all our treasures where on the tree (my dad and uncle were going to contribute the yule beer cans later), we crawled under and screamed Silver Bells until Rudy cried. Ditty's friend from college even got to share in the family fun.

Something wrong with that boy.....

Tonight during supper Baba picked out a lima bean and said, "I found it! There are those things I love."

My kid willingly eats lima beans. I don't even willingly eat them. They just happen to be in the mixed vegetables I buy because I always forget to look for the lima bean free label.

I want to go on that one!!!!

I'm either the greatest mom in the world or off my rocker. I took both kids, by myself, to Nickelodeon Universe at Mall of America today to ride rides. The day went pretty well. Rudy was content to patiently drool and chew on everything within arm's reach (greetings to tooth number two who made his appearance this morning - the first made his appearance the day after Thanksgiving).

Baba was content to ride as many rides as possible in the 3 hours allotted to his riding pleasure (on Tuesdays, Nick U offers a 3 hour unlimited ride wrist band for $9.95. Basically kids can ride all the 3 point rides until they puke or they reach the 3 hour time limit, whichever comes first. Best deal ever).

There was one minor hiccup in the day. Baba is 41 inches. You have to be 42 to ride a couple of the rides alone. He really wanted to ride Swiper's Swooper, but wasn't tall enough. With the help of a very nice Random Mom in line behind him, we avoided a meltdown. He chitchatted the entire ride with Random Mom. Random Mom got off the ride and said, "What a friendly little boy." Remind anyone of Baba's namesake?

Even worse then having to be 42 inches to ride Swiper's Swooper alone, you have to be 48 inches to ride the roller coaster he really wants to ride. The first hill looks like an upside down "U" - straight up and then straight down. (Big Zjosh, next time you are in town and feeling like going to an amusement park, I will so ride this ride with you). Then it goes into an upside down loop. I really, really wanted to ride it - I'm over 48 inches! - but I couldn't really leave my kids unattended. Darn kids.

I tried to make lifts for his shoes to help him "grow" the last inch out of a diaper, but they didn't work. Diapers are too squishy, must try other material. He was content to ride the Pineapple Popper 4 times in a row to make up for the injustice of his lack of height. His other ride of the day was the WonderPets Flyboat. Everytime he reached the top of the Flyboat ride, he would point to the roller coaster of his desire and say, "That's the one I want to go on." I would say he is too short and the operator would laugh.

To get his mind off of the unfairness of life, we had lunch. After lunch, he sat back and said, "Mom, I grew my inch. Let's go ride some more."

Unfortunately, he hadn't grown, but to make up for it we got some ice cream in his favorite hue, blue (it was cotton candy flavor and kind of gross, but to each his own). We also, much to the boy's delight, saw a set of triplets that was about Rudy's age. Baba said, "Mom, the only problem with 3 babies is we'd need to buy 2 more cribs."

While it is true we would need to buy 2 more cribs, I have a hard time believing that would be the only problem with triplets. I can think of several more, including the fact that, despite my best efforts, I have failed to grow an extra arm. When the number of babies outnumber the number of arms, I think that's a problem. Enough cribs or not.

Baba's New Pet

Shortly after Rudy was born, Ditty and Poonch II got a dog named Buster (or is it Busta?). Anyway, I asked Baba if we could get a dog instead of 5 more sisters. He politely told me otherwise.

Today while we were watching Franklin the Turtle for the 9,958,877,392 time (Franklin could count by 2's and tie his shoes. He could zip zippers and button buttons....) and eating popcorn, we had the following conversation:

Baba: Mom, can I have a popcorn seed for a pet?
Me: A popcorn seed for a pet?
Baba: I was thinking it would be a good pet, it won't poop anywhere.
Me: That's true. You better ask Dad.
Baba: (holding up the popcorn seed, admiring his pet) I will name him Pacos. Let's call Dad.

So we call Dad, who for some reason thought a popcorn seed pet was funny. I'm certainly not opposed to getting a pet for the boy. Pets teach responsibility, but how much responsibility does it take to take care of a popcorn seed?

Postscrip: Pacos the popcorn seed got thrown in with his brothers in the bowl and got tossed. So far, Baba is unaware that his precious pet sits in the bottom of the garbage can, waiting for someone to bring him to the curb. This could get ugly. Especially, since his Halloween pumpkin still sits on our counter, uncarved, because the pumpkin is his friend and he didn't want to cut it with a sharp knife.

Things heard around the house....

"Mom, I hit the baby with my ball and now she's crabby and I'm going to get swallowed by a whale."

"You love your big brother, dontcha baby? Yes, you do."

"Mom, I took her plug away and she's not crabby."

"Mom. I know I'm not supposed to be in her crib when she's napping, but I wanted to see her smile."

"I think I heard my baby. Let's go get her!"

"Dad! Bring Mom!" (apparently, I wasn't moving enough for him that night. He had only called for me twice!)

"Mom, I have an idea! Let's move Rudy's crib into my room and then we can put another baby in Rudy's room." (this was at 1 am)

"Let I see what's the matter."

"I already see-ed, Mom." (in response to any time I say, "We'll see."

"It's bedtime? That's awful."

"Mom!!!! My butt is cracked."

"How is a whale born?"

"When I grow up, I'm going to be a bee. I just have to grow a stinger and fill in my crack."

"Don't let my baby sleep, Mom. I want to play with her."

Me: Tomorrow is Saturday so Daddy doesn't have to work. Baba: No, Mom, Sad days are when Dad has to work.

Baba: Did someone forget a washcloth? Me: Did someone forget his manners? Baba: Did someone forget a washcloth, please?

"Mom! Let's name our next baby, 'Baby Skunk!' "

"Can I go back to day-care so you can have another baby in your tummy?"

"C'mon, Wili. Let's play bat-the-ball!"

"Make me something I've never ever had for lunch before."

"Spinach! I want spinach on my lunch."

"I don't think I've watched enough TV."

Child Labor

Why did they make child labor illegal? They look so cute doing it.
Note the hearing "selection." He is safe while laboring.

And Rudy makes such a good supervisor.

A typical day...

Today, like all days, started way too early. The boy alarm went off just after 5 am and the girl alarm went off shortly there after. Both woke up happy. I woke up crabby. I like sleep. Baba started the day by crawling in the crib to see his baby. And then told me to take a picture. My camera has been MIA since Saturday when we came home from my parents. I told the boy I didn't know where it was. He showed me where it was. Last time I let him "help" me unpack.

I told the boy it was time to get dressed. He told me it was time to farm. And he had a lot of farming to do today so he needed to be a naked farmer. I was laughing too hard to tell him no. Rudy then gave me a present in her diaper so we went upstairs. In the time it took me to change her, the boy had every pillow in the house sitting in front of the couch and was jumping off the couch in his undies. Again, laughing to hard to discourage the behavior.

After some jumping, he decided to go for a swim underwater with Baby Jaguar, so they crawled under the pillows, I mean, water.

Here he is with Wili and Baby Jaguar watching the ships sailing in the ocean. Despite what my least favorite teacher at Baba's school says, I don't think he is ruined by having watched TV. He sat and watched the invisible boats for at least 15 minutes. (The cat was either dead or sleeping since she didn't move during the whole "swimming" adventure that took place).

After I wrangled him into clothing, we went to vote. Baba was very disappointed to learn that voting did not involve a boat or leaving Baby Jaguar on shore while we went boating (he was going to sit in the back of the boat). In order to get over the trauma of finding voting to be not as exciting as he expected, we went to the food store where he got an apple. I tried to talk him into a donut. He insisted on an apple.

Lest you think that Baba is the only strange child in my house, Rudy has spent the last 30 or so minutes laying on her side cooing at our rocking chair.

I know the table is a helluva conversationalist, but I'm surprised at the recliner's way with words.

The Quest for the Halloween Bucket

I love shopping with Baba. First he tells that pharmacist that I shouldn't take my birth control because we want more babies. Then he tells me that I need to find a person in a red shirt to help us find the Halloween bucket he so desperately wants. He then proceeds to tell every person wearing a red shirt (employee or not) that we are looking for a candy bucket for Halloween.

I finally did it!

I've had grocery stores pay me to take various items off their hands, but until today, I've never had a grocery store pay me to take my entire order.

I bought 20 yoplait yogurts (we go through a lot of "o-gurt" in our house - this should last us a week) and 2 Ben and Jerry ice cream treats and they paid me 20 cents. I can probably die happy now.